THURSDAY, April 26, 2012

PROTECTION RACKET -- A group of women stripped to their bras and marched on the main police station in Kampala, capital of Uganda to protest police misconduct in grabbing the breast of an anti-government activist, during a protest rally last week.  One protester carried a sign saying “How would you like it if we squeezed your balls?”  Must have sunk in.  Several hours later, the chief of police was spotted at the local Big-5 buying a gross of MLB-approved batter’s cups.

CELL BOUND? -- The trial of former Democratic presidential candidate John Edwards, charged with channeling $1 million in campaign funds to conceal the existence of his mistress, Rielle Hunter, during his campaign, has gotten underway in Greensboro, North Carolina.  If convicted, Edwards faces up to 30 years in prison and $1.5 million in fines.  His chances of beating the rap look a little iffy, though.  His list of potential character witnesses includes former governors Elliott Spitzer and Rod Blagoivich. 

AD SPACE -- New Hampshire-born free climber, alpinist and BASE jumper Dean Potter, successfully crossed the 6,000-foot Enshi Grand Canyon in China's Hubei Province using a more dangerous slack line instead of a high-wire.  All expenses of the risky stunt were picked up by Dean’s American sponsor in exchange for his use of a balance pole shaped like a giant chopstick with "P.F. CHANG" printed on it.   

ANDY GUMPED -- Thirty-five public service organizations in India have joined together to demand that women be given the right to urinate in public facilities for free as Indian men do now.  Dubbed the “Right to Pee” campaign, the group is also demanding vending machines for sanitary napkins like mens’ condom dispensers.  Their aim is to elevate sanitation conditions in Mumbai at least to the level of the New York Subway System. 

OWL-UNDER-GLASS -- In May, George Clooney will host a fund-raising dinner for Barack Obama at his home in Los Angeles, charging $40,000 per couple to attend.  Not to be outdone, Ted Nugent will host a fund-raiser for Mitt Romney, will charge $50,000 a couple, and serve endangered species.

(Copyright (c) 2012 Robert L. Mills  All Rights Reserved)

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