SUN, MON, September 16, 17, 2012

THREADBARE -- As is their annual custom to cap Fashion Week, People Magazine named Gwyneth Paltrow the "Best Dressed Woman in America."   The second place slot went to Kate Middleton the Duchess of Kent who for the first time also captured the "Least Dressed" crown. 

PLAY BALL! -- Clint Eastwood's latest film "Trouble with the Curve" co-starring Amy Adams is doing respectable box office despite a sad ending.  It's not that he's a bad scout -- he discovers several pitching and hitting phenoms that end up in the Big Leagues.  But he has to be institutionalized after developing a bad habit of arguing with imaginary umpires.


WILD AND WOOLY -- A crane operator working on a construction site in San Francisco unearthed a perfectly preserved, ten pound tooth that once belonged to a wooly mammoth who lived during the Pleistocene Period.  Of course, San Franciscans are suspicious of any body part that big.  They were born during the Barry Bonds Period.


EQUAL TIME RULE -- Police in Florida arrested a man who held up a McDonald's wearing a Barack Obama mask.  He carried the ruse as far as signing his demand note "The Community Organizer."  Next day, a copycat robber held up the Wendy's next door wearing a Mitt Romney mask.  His note was signed "Olympics Organizer."

CHEERS! -- For the first time, visitors to Disney World's Magic Kingdom will be allowed to order beer and wine.  But drinkers will still have to put up with Disney's compulsive branding.  Draft beer is served by a guy dressed as Pluto from a keg shaped like a fire hydrant and the wine comes in a glass slipper delivered by Cinderella.

Copyright (c) 2012 by Robert L. Mills  All Rights Reserved

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Compiled from Bob's newsletter "Funnyside Up" published in 2000. This is a yuck and chuckle-filled stroll down memory lane to a time before the Bush administration had inflicted its damage -- a time before the search for WMDs and Osama bin Laden. See what we were laughing at back then, who was in the news and who had yet to enter rehab -- which NFL stars had yet to do time in the Gray Bar Hotel.