MONDAY, March 19, 2012

Only one day after meeting with President Obama to discuss the dire situation in Sudan, actor George Clooney was arrested while demonstrating outside the Sudanese Embassy in Washington and carted off to jail.  Later, while waiting for someone to bail him out, he was heard screaming out his cell window “Oh, brother where art thou?”  
Remember the hit movie “Home Alone”?  Well, the three-story home where it was filmed just sold for $1.6 million.  Strange terms included in the deed, though.  Along with the usual title to the house, out-buildings and fixtures, an addendum offers a $500,000 reward to the new owner if he can locate what’s left of MacCauley Culkin’s career.

This year’s Alaskan Iditarod was won by 25-year old Dallas Seavey.  After covering eleven hundred miles in the frozen tundra fighting sleet, snow and wind-driven ice, Dallas told reporters he discovered something he never knew.  On clear evenings, just like Sarah Palin said, he could see the Siberian Iditarod.

A study conducted by the head of the Howard Hughes Medical Institute concluded that male fruit flies rejected by females during the mating ritual are prone to “compensate” by drinking more alcohol than their successful competitors.  They also appear to prefer “kinky” sex that involves sticky paper and swatters.

What some art critics have dubbed a giant waste of money, artist Michael Heizer had a 340-ton chunk of solid granite hauled from Riverside, CA to the LA Museum of Art.  As if moving the gigantic rock wasn’t difficult enough, now Heizer faces his toughest challenge – to somehow chisel the thing into a statue of Rosie O’Donnell.

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Compiled from Bob's newsletter "Funnyside Up" published in 2000. This is a yuck and chuckle-filled stroll down memory lane to a time before the Bush administration had inflicted its damage -- a time before the search for WMDs and Osama bin Laden. See what we were laughing at back then, who was in the news and who had yet to enter rehab -- which NFL stars had yet to do time in the Gray Bar Hotel.