THURSDAY, December 27, 2012

BEHIND THE GREEN DUMPSTER -- The New York Public Library will undergo a multimillion dollar renovation that will include a new reading room equipped with the latest computer technology.   And it's really cutting-edge.  For instance, homeless people will now be able to watch  porn that features other homeless people. 

WE HAVE LIFTOFF -- NASA scientists are astounded at the photos being sent back from the Hubble Telescope showing some of the oldest galaxies known to exist.  Most remarkable are detailed photos that confirm the controversial "Big Bang Theory" -- not the creation of the universe, the TV sitcom. 

JOBERT -- Die hard fans of "Les Miserables" are turning out in droves to swoon over the new musical version with Hugh Jackman and Natalie Portman.  To get themselves into the mood, some dress up in period costumes, go into a 7-Eleven, steal a loaf of bread, and hope a clerk follows them.

COFFEE, TEA, JENNY CRAIG? -- Commercial Airlines are going nose wheel-to-nose wheel in a competition to provide travelers tasty and nutritious meals with the lowest calories.  According to a study, Virgin Atlantic leads with meals averaging 450 calories.   Whose meals are the most fattening?  Delta Burke Airlines.

OI OI -- The city of Lens, France with unemployment three times the national average, is attempting to attract tourists by opening a branch of Louvre.   To duplicate the Paris experience for visitors, local taxi drivers are being given a crash course in "rude."

Contents Copyright (c) 2012 by Robert L. Mills  All Rights Reserved

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Compiled from Bob's newsletter "Funnyside Up" published in 2000. This is a yuck and chuckle-filled stroll down memory lane to a time before the Bush administration had inflicted its damage -- a time before the search for WMDs and Osama bin Laden. See what we were laughing at back then, who was in the news and who had yet to enter rehab -- which NFL stars had yet to do time in the Gray Bar Hotel.