CHRISTMAS DAY, December 25, 2012

HONEST ABE -- The Academy has notified Stephen Spielberg that his epic film "Lincoln" may be disqualified from Oscar consideration because of historical inaccuracies.  To make the movie even more exciting, in one scene Lincoln is almost killed in a dynamite blast while posing for Mt. Rushmore.

WEAR YOUR SWEATER -- Jewish women rule the big screen right now.  Barbara Streisand plays a Jewish mother in "Guilt Trip," Bette Midler plays a Jewish grandmother in "Parental Guidance" and Leslie Mann another Jewish mother in "This is 40."  The trend continues.  Sarah Silverman has been signed for the lead in "The Life of Whoopie Goldberg."

GREENGROCER -- Researchers at Boeing used stacks of potatoes to simulate human passengers while testing Wi-Fi coverage at 35,000 feet because spuds come closest to matching the density and conductivity  of the human body.  To add even more realism, unshelled walnuts were attached to the "men" dummies and ripe cantaloupes to the "women."  

ARRRRG -- Cable companies claim they don't prosecute people who pirate their programs for free because it's too expensive.  Yeah, right.  Actually, they'd like to prosecute them but they tell D.A 's they'll come in to fill out the papers between two and five and then never show up.

G'DAY MATE -- Though it took several decades, eight of ten American motorists now buckle up behind the wheel.  But not because of dire warnings from Detroit or the National Safety Council. What finally did the trick was the threat of a visit from that GEICO auto insurance lizard.

Contents Copyright (c) 2012 by Robert L. Mills  All Rights Reserved

THANKS FOR THE MEMORY -- View over 550 classic vintage video clips of Bob Hope Specials available nowhere else!  Each are dated the year they originally aired on NBC from the 1977-78 season to 1991-92.  Included are segments from 1978's "Bob Hope Down Under" from Perth, Australia and 1979's "Bob Hope in China" taped in Peking and Shanghai (with Mikhail Baryshnikov).  Take a trip down Memory Lane that you won't soon forget!

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Compiled from Bob's newsletter "Funnyside Up" published in 2000. This is a yuck and chuckle-filled stroll down memory lane to a time before the Bush administration had inflicted its damage -- a time before the search for WMDs and Osama bin Laden. See what we were laughing at back then, who was in the news and who had yet to enter rehab -- which NFL stars had yet to do time in the Gray Bar Hotel.