FRI, SAT, July 6, 7, 2012

SPOKES FLY -- In San-Quentin, France, German cyclist Andre Greipel has won the accident-plagued fifth stage of the Tour de France with Switzerland’s Fabian Cancellara retaining the overall leader’s yellow jersey.  Somehow, it’s always been difficult for Americans to sense the excitement of a bunch of men riding bikes.  Maybe it would be easier if they thought of it as NASCAR with escargot and Napoleon Brandy instead of Nachos, hot wings and a cold brewski.

BOND… JAMES BOND -- An exhibit honoring the designers of the James Bond .007 films has opened in London.  Displaying many of Bond’s weapons designed especially for the franchise, the show will begin a world tour to major cities in August.  Already, the effects of the worldwide gasoline shortage will be seen in the next Bond film.  The surface-to-surface rocket launchers in Bond’s roadster have been replaced by siphoning tubes that insert themselves into the tanks of passing cars.

DECLAWED -- With an unimpressive 71 in the opening round of the Greenbriar Classic, Tiger Woods found himself eight strokes behind leader Vijay Singh and faced with a long climb back into the hunt.  Tiger got good news and bad news last week.  With his win at the AT&T, he surpassed Jack Nicholas’s career total PGA wins record.  The bad news is he still trails hoop icon Wilt Chamberlain  by 378,941 for the lifetime bimbos bedded record.  

THE DOCTOR IS OUT -- The FDA has vowed to crack down on medical apps that they haven’t formally approved among the 40,000 now in use.  Among those okeyed so far, the Pregnancy ++ app that tracks progress toward birth, and the Pill Identifier app that recognizes 10,000 medications through size, color and shape.  Among the no-go’s:  the Joan Rivers “Hack-A-Schnozz” Rhynoplasty app and the “Rear Ender” home colonoscopy app.

FIVE… FOUR… THREE – Playboy Magazine founder Hugh Hefner has made a bid to purchase Dick Clark Productions from the estate of the late rock ‘n’ roll legend.When you think about it, the two men had a lot in common.  Between Miss January and the Times Square ball, both of them figured out an interesting way to welcome the new year.

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"WINGS" --The cast of a 1983 sketch called "Get the Red Baron.." Pat Boone, Lee Marvin, Bob Hope, Ann Jillian and George Burns take their well-earned bows.  Note the authenticity and realism of the movie-quality set. This set was as authentic as the first Oscar-winner "Wings" which it parodied.  Ann Jillian was a frequent guest in the 70s and 80s. She had been a child star and, as an adult, saw her hit single “Wind Beneath My Wings” make the top of the charts. She married her bodyguard, a former policeman. 

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Copyright (c) 2012 by Robert L. Mills  All Rights Reserved

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