WEDNESDAY, July 4, 2012

SHOULD YOU CHOOSE -- Fourteen Olympics swimming medal winner Michael Phelps is poised to win seven gold medals in London, rivaling his Beijing performance but for Ryan Lochte who has declared this Olympics “my time.”  It’s not like Michael’s mission is impossible, but there are signs.  Every morning there’s a self-destroying tape recorder in his locker with a message that begins, “Good morning, Mr. Phelps… “

LICENSE TO FORGE -- Officials at the FBI and the U.S. Secret Service are scrambling to figure out a way to thwart Chinese forgers who are producing counterfeit drivers licenses that have routinely fooled TSA airport screeners, Customs officers and state troopers.   These guys even fooled State Farm who, based on Lindsay Lohan's phony knockoff, gave her a safe driver discount. 

AS TIME GOES BY -- Technicians at the International Earth Rotation and Reference System Service added one second to the world's clocks on Saturday night.  The "leap second" was needed to adjust atomic clocks to the slight delay in the earth's rotation.  While most people hardly noticed the addition of an extra second, Kim Kardashian took the opportunity to get married and divorced again.

MORNING AFTER -- Charlie Sheen, who has been getting generally favorable reviews for his new sitcom “Anger Management,” told reporters that he realizes now that he completely flipped out last summer.  In fact, he’s so ashamed and contrite for his behavior, he even got himself confused with Robert Downey, Jr. and apologized for taking a nap in that neighbor kid’s bed.

ESCALADE ESCAPADE -- Last week, rapper 50 Cent was rushed to a hospital for injuries he sustained in a collision with a Mac truck on New York’s Long Island Expressway.  His SUV’s bullet-proofing proved a match for the truck and may have saved his life.  He’s fully recovered and is on the road touring again.  But under a new name.  While he was convalescing, inflation took its toll and he’s now known as “39 Cent.”

DOWN UNDER -- Here’s writer/producer Chris Bearde with Barbara Eden in February 1978, minutes after we touched down in Perth, Australia. Chris had flown to Perth a week before to set up our production facilities and coordinate with our Aussie tech crew. As Writers Guild members, Gig and I had to apply for a waiver from the Australian Writers Guild. Whenever we worked in a foreign country, we complied with local guild rules — except, of course, in China.  Hope would emcee the inauguration of the Perth Entertainment Centre. (David Letterman was a credited writer on this special.)


Copyright (c) 2012 by Robert L. Mills  All Rights Reserved

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