THURSDAY, June 14, 2012

HEADS UP -- The producers of the HBO mini-series “Game of Thrones” are denying there was anything political in their decision to show the decapitated head of George W. Bush on a spike in episode one beside the heads of the boy king Joffrey and his fiancee Sansa Stark outside the castle in King’s Landing…

… Creators David Benioff and D.B. Weiss told reporters, “It’s not a political statement.  We just had to use whatever head we had around.” Leftovers from movies like "Advise and Consent to Behead," "Sunrise at Campo Headless," and "All the Presidents' Heads."

According to the China Daily, archaeologists digging near Xian unearthed 114 new terracotta warriors at the vast Qin Dynasty tomb complex in Shaanxi Province.  Along with the fully equipped, brightly painted  warriors, were weapons of brass and iron known to have been used during the Qin Dynasty...  

... Their authenticity is unquestioned according to a spokesman from the Ministry of Culture.  Well, maybe one statue is a little suspicious – the giant stone horse with “Welcome to P.F. Chang’s” carved on it.

MITT CUES –- The Romney campaign has been plagued lately by a rash of misspellings is in his commercials and print ads.  The problem seems to be his staff.  They're so programmed to oppose anything Barack Obama suggests, they even challenge their computer’s spell checker, claim victory, and print the mistakes.


BLUE LAGOONED -- Faced with a worldwide shortage of the lethal chemicals traditionally used to inject condemned prisoners, the State of Missouri has begun using the readily available propofol, the anesthetic that put Michael Jackson to sleep permanently…  

 …Now the penal authorities are facing another problem.  The death row inmates so identify with Jacko, they’re asking for their last meal served by Brooke Shields.

BLOOD, SWEAT, TEARS -- British Prime Minister David Cameron, stopping off last Sunday for a pint in a pub with his wife Nancy and eight-year-old daughter Nancy.   Fifteen minutes after leaving the darts and brew palace, the couple noticed that their daughter was missing.  They rushed back, retrieved the girl and all was well.  Unfortunately, the PM was less than truthful with the press after the story leaked out.  Putting his best politician's spin on the incident, he told them they were attending Sunday Mass at “Our Lady of the Pig and Thistle.”


Copyright (c) 2012 by Robert L. Mills  All Rights Reserved

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Compiled from Bob's newsletter "Funnyside Up" published in 2000. This is a yuck and chuckle-filled stroll down memory lane to a time before the Bush administration had inflicted its damage -- a time before the search for WMDs and Osama bin Laden. See what we were laughing at back then, who was in the news and who had yet to enter rehab -- which NFL stars had yet to do time in the Gray Bar Hotel.