;

FRI, SAT, SUN, June 8, 9, 10, 2012

6-8-2012
CRADLE CRASHER -- Twenty-six year old Crystal Harris, the Playboy bunnette who unceremoniously dumped Bunny-ville founder Hugh Hefner, 87, at the altar a year ago is reportedly back in his hutch in good standing.  According to friends, he'll be more financially alert this time before setting a date.  Last time, he had to pay $380 for a rented tux he didn't use.    


PEDDLE POOCH -- A group of professional cyclists training for the Tour De France attracted a stray dog who ended up running along side them for the entire 1100 mile marathon across twelve mountains in China from Kangding in Sichuan province to Lhasa, Tibet.  The intrepid pooch they named "Won Ton Tin" landed an agent and is now making the rounds of Shanghai's morning chat shows.


SORRY, CHARLIE! -- Stepping up efforts to intercept marijuana shipments being transported by boat from Mexico, the Coast Guard discovered 3000 pounds of pot floating off the coast of Newport Beach, CA.  Drug Enforcement authorities are staying mum on whose stash it might have been, but Charlie the Tuna was recently spotted at a check-out stand in a 7-Eleven wearing shades and buying seven packages of chocolate chip cookies.
 

 PROTECTION RACKET -- Discouraged by their lack of success promoting total abstinence, New York's Bedford-Stuyvesant High School decided to provided free condoms to all couples attending this year's Senior Prom, but there was such an uproar they reconsidered.  Actually, the free handout would have been a perfect tie-in with this year's Roman History theme -- "Remembering the Trojan Wars Under the Stars."


             YouTube VIDEO of the DAY
 

LIGHT SABERS -- The year George Lucas propelled "Star War"s across America's movie screens, we couldn't pass up an opportunity to spoof it. Our version, entitled "Scar Wars," starred Olivia Newton-John as Princess Hialeah, Perry Como as Luke Sleepwalker, and Hope as Barf Vader. The epic would recount the abduction of Santa Claus, complete with his sled and reindeer, literally gobbled up by Vader's space vehicle. (We ordered a small model of a space ship with a set of iron jaws in the front from the prop department.)  This sketch was taped in 1978. 


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Copyright (c) 2012 by Robert L. Mills   All Rights Reserved 








 

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THE LAUGH MAKERS: A Leonard Maltin "Top 20" Year End Pick!

DOLORES HOPE MEDLEY

DOLORES HOPE "Silver Bells" (with Bob)

BOB HOPE'S 1983 U.S. COLLEGE CAMPUS TOUR: Your Alma Mater Here?


"Having spent twenty years writing for the indefatigable Bob Hope, and traveling all over the world, Bob Mills is well qualified to salute the famous corps of gag men who kept the comedian knee-deep in jokes. These first-hand recollections summon up the final phase of Hope’s career—and the end of the trail for an entire brand of show business."

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Compiled from Bob's newsletter "Funnyside Up" published in 2000. This is a yuck and chuckle-filled stroll down memory lane to a time before the Bush administration had inflicted its damage -- a time before the search for WMDs and Osama bin Laden. See what we were laughing at back then, who was in the news and who had yet to enter rehab -- which NFL stars had yet to do time in the Gray Bar Hotel.

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