G'DAY MATE -- Australia celebrates its 225th birthday this week, marking the arrival of the first delivery of Irish convicts at Sydney Harbor. Among the assorted criminals on board was Angus Gibson, great great grandfather of Mel, serving a sentence for driving his oxcart under the influence.
DOUBLING DOWN -- In Las Vegas, MBA graduates from prestigious universities like Harvard and Wharton competed in a high stakes poker game to qualify for an executive job at Caesar's Palace. Casino managers got the idea from the main showroom's annual "breast auditions."
WIND RESISTANCE -- PepsiCo, Inc., makers of Gatorade, removed brominate from their formula after discovering that the chemical is a patented flame retardant in Europe. Which explains why college football players seldom do well in frat party flatulence-lighting contests.
YOU BETCHA -- Former John McCain running mate Sarah Palin had her $1 million-a-year contract with Fox News cancelled because, according to a spokesman,"she's no longer hot." But not to worry. She's already been signed to host Saturday Night Live where she'll debut her dead-on Tina Fey impression.
(Contents Copyright (c) 2013 by Robert L. Mills All Rights Reserved)