TUESDAY, September 20, 2011

The influence of large corporations may extend as far back as biblical times.  Archaeologists digging near the cradle of Christianity have discovered credible evidence that the Three Wise men were actually carrying gifts of stocks, bonds and negotiable securities from Goldman-Sachs, Franklin Templeton and Merck.

The San Francisco Board of Supervisors has banned "sexual contact between crowded passengers using public transportation..."  Standing passengers must have one hand on the strap and may use the other to read a newspaper or operate a can of mace.

Ultra-luxury car maker Maserati has recalled 763 late model four-door Quattroporte sedans citing suspension problems.  According to complaints voiced by numerous owners, the car has a tendency to turn into parking lots of restaurants which have fewer than five stars.

LA grocery clerks have struck major southern California supermarkets.  Issues in dispute include management's refusal to pay higher wages, provide more inclusive medical coverage and to change the express line sign from "10 Items or Less" to the more grammatically correct "10 Items or Fewer."

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THE LAUGH MAKERS: A Leonard Maltin "Top 20" Year End Pick!


DOLORES HOPE "Silver Bells" (with Bob)

BOB HOPE'S 1983 U.S. COLLEGE CAMPUS TOUR: Your Alma Mater Here?

"Having spent twenty years writing for the indefatigable Bob Hope, and traveling all over the world, Bob Mills is well qualified to salute the famous corps of gag men who kept the comedian knee-deep in jokes. These first-hand recollections summon up the final phase of Hope’s career—and the end of the trail for an entire brand of show business."


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Compiled from Bob's newsletter "Funnyside Up" published in 2000. This is a yuck and chuckle-filled stroll down memory lane to a time before the Bush administration had inflicted its damage -- a time before the search for WMDs and Osama bin Laden. See what we were laughing at back then, who was in the news and who had yet to enter rehab -- which NFL stars had yet to do time in the Gray Bar Hotel.