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MONDAY, September 12, 2011

Fisticuffs legend Oscar de la Hoya is out of rehab and has admitted that he was  caught by the paparazzi last year wearing ladies undergarments.  Actually, his name alone gave him away.  "de la Hoya" is Spanish for "Do these trunks make me look fat?"

The Lifetime Channel has signed supermodel Molly Sims to host a new reality show called "Project Accessory," a spin-off of "Project Runway."  The show will mark the first use of the newly-developed "Bulimi-Cam" which digitally adds 30 pounds to supermodels so viewers can see them.

Michael Moore confides in his new book that his bodyguards are retired Navy Seals.  Actually, Michael employs lots of military personnel.  He just hired the Army's 101st Airborne Division to provide the silk needed to make his cargo shorts.  

Archaeologists digging in Egypt came up with a mummy whose brain had been removed.  They're being careful not to make any rash conclusions, though.  They've been gun shy ever since they found that mummy missing its asp and announced they'd discovered Cleopatra.
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THE LAUGH MAKERS: A Leonard Maltin "Top 20" Year End Pick!

DOLORES HOPE MEDLEY

DOLORES HOPE "Silver Bells" (with Bob)

BOB HOPE'S 1983 U.S. COLLEGE CAMPUS TOUR: Your Alma Mater Here?

"Having spent twenty years writing for the indefatigable Bob Hope, and traveling all over the world, Bob Mills is well qualified to salute the famous corps of gag men who kept the comedian knee-deep in jokes. These first-hand recollections summon up the final phase of Hope’s career—and the end of the trail for an entire brand of show business."

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WakiLeaks: History Declassified 2000 (Vol. One) is now available on Kindle for $2.99

Compiled from Bob's newsletter "Funnyside Up" published in 2000. This is a yuck and chuckle-filled stroll down memory lane to a time before the Bush administration had inflicted its damage -- a time before the search for WMDs and Osama bin Laden. See what we were laughing at back then, who was in the news and who had yet to enter rehab -- which NFL stars had yet to do time in the Gray Bar Hotel.

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