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FRI, SAT, SUN, March 11, 12, 13, 2011

Moammar Khadaffi has gotten more press coverage this past week than ever before.  You should be aware that those medals he wears are total fakes.  Well, he does have one authentic one -- the wings a United pilot gave him once during a tour of the cockpit.

I-Phone now has an app that alerts men where to locate free condoms.  Women have  an app that reminds them that it’s probably not a good idea to sleep over with a guy who can’t afford a condom.

Accutron has developed a watch that keeps time, predicts the weather, and has device that sounds an alarm at home when an elderly loved one wanders beyond preset parameters.  May not mean much to you, but Lindsay Lohan can kiss that ankle bracelet goodbye.

Sixty billion dollars is the estimated amount Americans will put down on this year’s NCAA “March Madness.”  It’s a little different this time around.  The largest payoff will go to the fan who guesses which NBA draft choice will be arrested first.

Genetic scientists have discovered evidence that suggests early man may have had “penile spines” on his genitalia.  Which explains earlier archaeological discoveries that Neanderthal men once made condoms out of armadillo skins. 
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THE LAUGH MAKERS: A Leonard Maltin "Top 20" Year End Pick!

DOLORES HOPE MEDLEY

DOLORES HOPE "Silver Bells" (with Bob)

BOB HOPE'S 1983 U.S. COLLEGE CAMPUS TOUR: Your Alma Mater Here?

"Having spent twenty years writing for the indefatigable Bob Hope, and traveling all over the world, Bob Mills is well qualified to salute the famous corps of gag men who kept the comedian knee-deep in jokes. These first-hand recollections summon up the final phase of Hope’s career—and the end of the trail for an entire brand of show business."

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WakiLeaks: History Declassified 2000 (Vol. One) is now available on Kindle for $2.99

Compiled from Bob's newsletter "Funnyside Up" published in 2000. This is a yuck and chuckle-filled stroll down memory lane to a time before the Bush administration had inflicted its damage -- a time before the search for WMDs and Osama bin Laden. See what we were laughing at back then, who was in the news and who had yet to enter rehab -- which NFL stars had yet to do time in the Gray Bar Hotel.

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