WEDNESDAY, April 3, 2013

PLAY BALL! -- On major league baseball's opening day, the Los Angeles Dodgers unveiled their new $100 stadium face lift.  Improvements include wider aisles, larger, clearer scoreboards, and a Barkley's Bank ATM in the dugout for the players to more easily deposit their $230 million worth of paychecks.  

SHYSTER SHORTAGE -- Struggling to repay average student loans of $100,000, forty graduates of California law schools have sued them, claiming a lack of jobs as promised in the schools' brochures.   Several environmental groups have filed a counter suit asking the court to declare their failure a blessing. 

BRAIN GAME -- President Obama launched a new project called the "Brain Initiative" geared to improve the development of science in America to better compete with China and India.   Goals include unlocking the mysteries of  epilepsy, dementia, Alzheimer's, and the unexplained ratings decline of "American Idol."  

PROFESSIONAL COURTESY -- Apple apologized to customers in China after the state newspaper "The People's Daily" took the company to task for their shoddy after-sale service.  Seems that purchasers in Beijing and Shanghai resented having to call India to get tech advice on the very devices they had assembled.

AIR CALORIE -- Air Samoa has introduced the concept of  basing their fares on a passenger's weight plus luggage, charging $1 to $4.15 per kilogram depending on the length of the trip.   And here's the best part, ladies.  The scale they use has no dial -- the clerk at the check-in counter receives it digitally and whispers it to you. 

(Contents Copyright (c) 2013 by Robert L. Mills  All Rights Reserved)

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