INSERT TAB "A" INTO... -- Ever alert to expand their products and services, Swedish-owned Ikea, home of reasonably priced assemble-yourself furniture and accessories, is entering the hospitality industry, beginning with 100 budget hotels across Europe. Budget is an understatement. For only $20, you get a large room with a king-sized bed. Well - uh - not exactly a bed. Actually, you get a stack of lumber and a screwdriver.
FAIRWAY FAIRNESS -- Finally breaking the iron shackles of tradition that for decades has barred women from membership, Augusta National Golf Club has enlarged its welcome mat. Among the first female members, former Bush Cabinet officer Condoleezza Rice who already has her own locker and set of custom-made Calloways. Only she doesn't call them clubs. She calls them "weapons of mass destruction."
GOING DOWN -- Elevator music icon Kenny G has filed for divorce from his wife of 20 years, Lyndie Benson-Gorelick. According to friends, their issue concerns the honesty and openness that all marriages, by their very nature, require. It seems that even after 20 years Kenny steadfastly refuses to tell her what the "G" stands for.
BIMBO FUNGO -- Major League baseball officials were floored by a recent medical and life expectancy study that shows former big league ball players are less fit, more prone to serious illness, and die sooner than former NFL players. While the popularity of chewing tobacco in the dugout is considered a major culprit, the most relevant finding was that 300 pound linebackers are less of a long-term health threat than a 120 pound starlet with a seven-year film contract.
SARDINEVILLE -- Symbolic of a country literally bursting at the seams, Shanghai China is by far the fastest-growing city on the planet with a population that's increased by 10 million since 1990, growing by a half-million per year. Good news for U.S. government loans, though. The Chinese now accept parking spaces as collateral.
Copyright (c) 2012 by Robert L. Mills All Rights Reserved
KEEN SCREEN -- Rensselaer Polytechnic Institute warns people who use their Kindles, I-Pads or computers two hours before bedtime risk a sleepless night. Seems the back lit screens fool the body into believing it's daytime and reduces the production of sleep-inducing melatonin up to 22%. On the plus side, if you've spent the two hours watching porn, you're up and ready to go.
