WEDNESDAY, June 2, 2010

President Obama celebrated Memorial Day with a visit to Abraham Lincoln Cemetery near Chicago where he delivered a speech recalling the sacrifices of our military past and present and then, in a last-minute change of plans prompted by developments in the Gulf of Mexico, laid a wreath on the Tomb of Jacques Costeau.

CNN news-thrush Campbell Brown, whose ratings this season have plummeted 40% from a year ago, has requested a release from her contract.  Network insiders say she was pushed over the edge when the CNN Promo Department came up with a new theme for her that went “Um-um good, um-um good, that’s what Campbell Brown is… “

After telling Oprah Winfrey that she had not actually seen the video of herself demanding $724,000 for access to Prince Andrew because “I had hit the gutter,“ Sarah Ferguson then dove behind the couch cushions to see if Tom Cruise had left any loose change.

Former “Survivor” executive Bruce Beresford-Redman has been formally charged with the murder of his wife Monica whose body was found in a Cancun, Mexico septic tank.  Displaying what police are calling “unbelievable chutzpah,” he was on his way to sell his screenplay to David Letterman. 

The New York City Ballet is rehearsing “Call me Ben,” based on the life of Benjamin “Bugsy” Siegel, the notorious mobster who built the Flamingo Hotel in Vegas and died with a bullet through his eye while sitting on the couch of his Beverly Hills mansion.  One unimpressed reviewer summed it up as “’Swan Lake’ with bodies instead of swans.”

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Excerpted From THE LAUGH MAKERS  

One day, my phone rang, and it was Hope in need of a quick joke fix.  It was on a Friday afternoon about four, and he was scheduled to appear as a guest on the Tonight Show which in those days began taping at five-thirty.  He was at home in his makeup chair with Don Marando performing his usual duties. Hope had just learned that the guest following him — he always insisted that Carson bring him on first — was comedian Richard Pryor, making his first television appearance since his near-fatal encounter with an exploding crack pipe some nine months earlier.  Pryor had undergone extensive skin grafts on his face, neck and chest performed at the Grossman Burn Center, and his slow and painful rehabilitation had been covered extensively in the press — coverage which Hope had somehow missed, I was about to find out.

A member of the Tonight Show staff had called with a special request from Johnny that Hope remain for an additional segment — “move one down on the couch” as they used to say — during Carson’s interview with Pryor. Now Hope was to go on television in little over an hour. While we had already provided him with plenty of “ad-libs” to trade with Johnny, he had no lines relating to Pryor.  It was a situation in which he felt vulnerable. To him, having a few lines in his pocket was like an insurance policy. I assured him that Pryor’s appearance wouldn’t be packed with laughs since he’d be relating a near death
experience, hardly a fun topic. Hope disagreed. He didn’t believe that Pryor’s injuries had been that serious, and he wanted something witty to say when the two shook hands.  “Like what?” I asked, unable to envision anything even remotely appropriate to the moment.  “Something like this,” he said. “Tell me, Richard, how did it feel playing your own birthday cake?”  I was nothing short of stunned. I knew he couldn’t get away with a line like that and told him so.  “You’re wrong,” he insisted. “His accident wasn’t that big a deal.”  Even if it weren’t, I pointed out, the public perceived it as life-threatening, and any flippant reference to it would make him appear heartless, unfeeling and worse, stupid.

I stood firm. Hope was stubborn, but you could argue with him if you were sure you were on solid ground. Actually, he appreciated staffers standing up to him if they believed it was necessary. He detested the “yes men” who so commonly surround celebrities. Nonetheless, he continued to insist he was right about Pryor’s injury.  He appealed to Don whom I could hear in the background supporting my position.  Outnumbered, he begrudgingly gave up on the idea, but continued to insist that we were both wrong.  That night I taped the Tonight Show and the next morning watched as Johnny finished with Hope — who managed to slip in a few of our jokes — and introduced Pryor who, slowly and obviously still in considerable pain, came through the curtain wearing a ball cap to hide his still-visible burns.  Pryor appeared genuinely touched as the audience gave him a two-minute standing ovation. Hope applauded, too, as he glanced into the camera with a look that said, “What was I thinking?” He knew Don and I would be watching the show and was sending us an apology — telepathically.

Tomorrow:  The day Danny Thomas terrified Hope. 

Order THE LAUGH MAKERS on line:

http://www.amazon.com/LAUGH-MAKERS-Behind-Scenes-Incredible/product-reviews/1593933231/ref=cm_cr_pr_link_2?ie=UTF8&showViewpoints=0&pageNumber=2

Also available in an unabridged audio version read by the author: 

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UK orders:

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