SOPRANOS II... Petreaus recently described a "Mafia-like presence" in Iraq. Ah, at last---an enemy we can fashion an HBO series around.
SCUTTLEBUTT... A Navy commander is charged with videotaping Annapolis midshipmen having sex in his den. Police confiscated a rough cut of "Debbie Does the Admiral."
BIBLE BABBLE... According to a University of Chicago poll, only 24% of Americans have faith in organized religion. Two percentage points below organized baseball and ten below organized crime.
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"I'm confident we can work with Congress to come up with an economic stimulus package that will send a clear signal to the risk takers and capital formators of our country."
George W. Bush 9/17/01 Washington, DC
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OBSERVE IF YOU WILL... A federal grand jury in Las Vegas will soon hand down an indictment charging David Copperfield with sexual harassment. It's slow going, though. Jury members keep disappearing---and reappearing as bunnies.
DARE TO DREAM... Stanley O'Niel, the first black CEO at Merrill-Lynch, was ousted for poor performance on the job but nonetheless was awarded a $200 million severance package. Think there could be enough money to get rid of Clarence Thomas?
INJECTION COUNTER... O'Hare, LAX, JFK and Boston Logan are among airports now offering passengers flu shots during layovers. Great news. Can food poisoning shots be far behind?
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[] Catch Bob's weekly on-line radio show "INSIDE TELEVISION" for the latest articles, celebrity profiles and interviews Thursday mornings from 8:20 to 9:00 am. PDT. LARRS, the all-volunteer, commercial free, non-profit Los Angeles Radio Reading Service is 24-hour Newsradio for the Blind, an affiliate of Minnesota's Radio Talking Book Network. Check it out. We welcome your support.
www.larrs.org
password: independence
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FORGIVE & FORGET... The State Department is mum on reports that those trigger-happy Blackwater mercenaries were given immunity from prosecution for killing 17 Iraqi civilians. According to a White House insider, Bush was granting himself, Cheney, Rice and Rumsfeld immunity and thought "Oh, what the hell?" and penciled them in.
DEEP THRONE... Two men have been arrested in London for attempting to extort $100,000 from a member of the royal family over a sex video. Details are sketchy, but unconfirmed reports say Scotland Yard is focusing on Camilla Parker Bowles and a mule from Yorkshire.
MOM TOME... Britney Spears' mother is reportedly writing a book on parenting. A how not to book.
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A Longtime Bob Hope Joke Writer Presents Daily Insightful Topical Satire Of Current Events (Illustrated) Plus Rare Photos From Hollywood's Bygone Era And Excerpts From THE LAUGH MAKERS By Robert L. Mills -- Color Photos From the Book and Rare Classic Vintage Video Clips! Send Your Show Biz Questions to "ASK BOB" at: TheLaughMakers@GMail.com
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