THURSDAY, February 14, 2013

WOULD THIS MAN HIDE CRIMINALS?

DEO GRATIAS -- Catholic cardinals will soon convene at the Vatican to elect a new pope.  Ballots are hand-written, placed in a gold chalice, counted and burned.  Special nuns oversee the entire voting process to insure ecclesiastical accuracy.  Maybe you've heard if them -- the Little Sisters of the Hanging Chad?

 

PLEASURE 1-A -- An upcoming seminar at the University of Minnesota is entitled "Tips to Better Female Orgasms."  Topics aimed at male students include "Making Foreplay Funplay"... "Playing the G Spot Like a Symphony Orchestra"... and "Promise to Pay Off Her Student Loans."

SWITCH HITTING -- A new study on aging found that seniors who are bi-lingual are less prone to develop senility.  Those who are bi-coastal enjoy additional health benefits of travel and those who are bi-sexual -- well, you get the idea.
 

TAKE ME OUT -- With April just around the corner, the long-awaited baseball season approaches -- with that distinctive smell of freshly-cut grass, the crack of bat on ball.  One Yankee pitching coach was heard to exclaim "I love the smell of anabolic steroids in the morning!"
  

 

NEW LEAF -- Chevrolet has replaced its longtime ad slogan "Like a Rock" with one more appealing to buyers with a sense of adventure, "Find New Roads."  They got the idea from Toyota's slogan after the company faced a massive recall due to sudden unexplained acceleration -- "Find a New Car."
 







(Contents Copyright (c) 2013 by Robert L. Mills  All Rights Reserved) 

THANKS FOR THE MEMORY -- One of Sarah Jessica Parker's earliest TV appearances was on a Bob Hope special taped in 1979 when Sarah was starring in "Annie" on Broadway.  View over 550 classic vintage video clips of Bob Hope Specials available nowhere else!  Each are dated the year they originally aired on NBC from the 1977-78 season to 1991-92.  Included are segments from 1978's "Bob Hope Down Under" from Perth, Australia and 1979's "Bob Hope in China" taped in Peking and Shanghai (with Mikhail Baryshnikov).  Take a trip down Memory Lane that you won't soon forget!
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