WEDNESDAY, August 15, 2012

PUMP YOU UP -- Former California governor Arnold Schwarzenegger has gifted USC with a $200 million endowment to establish a think tank that will bear his name.  The scientists will attempt to discover a method of successfully inducing governors' maids and popes' butlers to keep their mouths shut.

RETIREE -- A hunter in the Florida Everglades shot a 17 foot long, 165 pound Burmese python, the largest ever recorded in the state.   The non-indigenous reptile, which has an uncanny ability to blend in among the Florida wildlife, was wearing white shoes, plaid shorts and carrying a set of golf clubs.    

GOOOOOAL! -- Scientists at Nike are working on a soccer ball that will transmit its location, direction and velocity to players wearing a receiving unit.  They purchased the concept for $3 million from Wayne Gretzsky who, during his bachelor days,  designed a ball that electronically notified him whenever a Spice Girl was in the stands.

 

CAST OFF! -- Scientists in Italy are analyzing the remnants of a sailing vessel believed to have been built during the time of Christ.  In fact, they now theorize that Jesus himself may have had a hand in its design.  The craft has no gangplank --
passengers had to walk on water to board.
 

MON DIEU! -- Following the death of a surfer in the Indian Ocean, the French government has offered a reward to anyone who successfully captures a bull shark.  The preditors are caught live and must be tested in a tank before payment is made.  The French species is the only one that's rude to fish before eating them. 


Copyright (c) 2012 by Robert L. Mills  All Rights Reserved