So far has Tiger Woods' star plummeted -- so low has he descended in the PGA rankings -- he may not qualify to play in his own tournament next month at the Sherwood Country Club. That's almost as professionally unthinkable as -- let's see -- it would be like "The View" having to go to a commercial because nobody could think of anything to say.
According to the latest batch of WikiLeaks disclosures, Saudi King Abdullah, who claims to be 82, is actually 92. Kings just seem to have difficulty keeping track of numbers. Larry keeps insisting he's had only four wives.
Former IMF chief Dominique Strauss-Kahn told French TV that he suffered from a "moral failing" when he assaulted a New York chambermaid. But you have to remember the French term for "moral failing" is "le comprimision ala moral" which, roughly translated means, "Undress. I'm on a coffee break."
Microsoft has released its long-anticipated Windows 8 operating system. According to a press release sent out to distributors by Bill Gates, the system's tech support has been completely upgraded and now includes complementary curry recipes.
A Longtime Bob Hope Joke Writer Presents Daily Insightful Topical Satire Of Current Events (Illustrated) Plus Rare Photos From Hollywood's Bygone Era And Excerpts From THE LAUGH MAKERS By Robert L. Mills -- Color Photos From the Book and Rare Classic Vintage Video Clips! Send Your Show Biz Questions to "ASK BOB" at: TheLaughMakers@GMail.com