With the royal wedding just a month off, sales of novelty items are flying off London’s souvenir shop shelves. Hottest seller so far is the “Princess Kate” bobble head doll that, when wound up, slices off the bobble head of a commoner doll.
The Pentagon has named the US Army’s invasion of Libya “Operation Odyssey Dawn.” Not to be confused with the USO’s “Operation Tony Orlando and Dawn” carried out under cover of darkness during the war in Vietnam.
Former House Speaker Nancy Pelosi was rushed to a hospital in Rome after suffering a dizzy spell during a congressional junket. Current House Speaker John Bohner immediately issued a press release stating that he would be willing to submit to a DNA test to disprove paternity.
Kevin Costner has been tapped to play Clark Kent’s dad in the next “Superman” sequel. He’ll portray Atwater Kent, 30-year employee of AT&T, who’s in charge of locating suitable booths for Clark to change clothes in.
Al Qaeda has announced it will soon publish a magazine aimed exclusively at Muslim women. It will be designed after Oprah’s magazine “O,“ but Instead of giving fans new cars, they’ll get new pick-up trucks to blow themselves up in.
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