THANKSGIVING DAY, November 25, 2010

Cops in San Diego have an APB out for a 78-year old bank robber they nicknamed the “Geezer Bandit.”   He was positively identified through  surveillance cameras and demand notes scrawled on the backs of bingo cards.

After four decades as the “Today Show” movie reviewer, Gene Shallit, retired.  Before he gathered his possessions and left the premises, security personnel found the mummified remains of three production assistants and Hugh Downs in his hair.

ABC aired the first holiday special, “A Charlie Brown Christmas.”  Next week, TLC will air “A Talent Deprived Christmas” in which Paris Hilton and Bristol Palin decorate the Kardashians.

Desperate to find measures to avoid bankruptcy, Irish officials for the first time are charging tourists to kiss the Blarney Stone  --  and if they pay cash, they’re also allowed to grope it.

To decrease their attractiveness to children, health officials in the UK have proposed removing labels from tobacco products in favor of a plain, brown packet.  Apparently, they’ve forgotten how their 1944 ban on toothpaste labels worked out.