MONDAY, May 10, 2010

PONTE VEDRA BEACH, FL (PBS) - Tiger Woods abruptly withdrew from the Players Championship, complaining of a pain in his neck he told reporters was “probably a slipped disc.”  After x-rays were taken however, doctors announced that the pain apparently came from the impacted head of a nine iron that they estimate has been there since last Thanksgiving.

NEW YORK (BBC) - The oldest performer ever to host “Saturday Night Live,” Betty White wowed fans and critics alike with her cutting edge “octo-monologue” and roles in several sketches.  According to preliminary Nielsen figures, there were more nursing homes tuned to the show than for the final episode of “Murder, She Wrote.” 

MANHATTAN (AP)  NY Giants Hall of Famer Lawrence Taylor has pleaded guilty to paying $300 for sex in a suburban Holiday Inn with a 16-year old prostitute.  Not even Tiger Woods frequented underage hookers, but then Tiger had an advantage --  athletes who keep their own score are better at counting.

NEW YORK (BBC) - A 1932 Pablo Picasso painting called “Nude, Green Leaves and Bust” set a new record of $106 million for the most expensive art work ever sold at auction.  It shouldn’t be confused with the 1956 documentary of the same name in which  Marilyn Monroe and Robert Mitchum are arrested in a cheap motel for smoking pot.

NASHVILLE (AP) - Citizens of the Country Music capital are digging out after the worst flooding in decades inundated low level areas of the city including the block where the Grand Ol’ Opry Theater is located.  It’s being described as the worst blow to the twang and tears industry since “Hee-Haw” was canceled.
_______________________________

Excerpted From THE LAUGH MAKERS   (page 254)

To be sure, unforeseen problems bedeviled every show to some degree, but by far the most ill-fated special Hope produced on my watch was taped at the Oscars Theater in Stockholm before Sweden’s King Carl Gustav and Queen Sylvia in February, 1986.  Billed as a Command Performance, Hope had agreed to emcee the black-tie gala entitled Bob Hope’s Royal Command Performance from Sweden, the proceeds of which were to go to the king’s favorite charity, the Children’s International Summer Village.  Hope would host the show and in return would own the American rights which he’d license to NBC. It was a potentially profitable deal since most of the production expenses would be picked up by the Swedish government.

But even before the Scandinavian Airlines 747 had been loaded with our luggage at LAX, the hex kicked in. As Gene Perret and I sat in the executive lounge putting the finishing touches on a Viking sketch we were
confident would have the Swedes in hysterics from Goteborg to Lapland, producers Elliott Kozak and Dick Arlett came in and hit us between the eyes with the news that Sweden’s Prime Minister, Olaf Palme, had just been assassinated while walking his dog on a Stockholm street.  The room fell silent. Glen Campbell, who had been sitting across from us noodling a few licks, put down his guitar and stared ahead blankly. Only moments before, we had entered the lounge filled with excited anticipation of what promised to be a fun-filled and interesting journey to a land few of us had visited.  Two other troubadours who would appear on the show, Shirley Jones and Emanuel Lewis, looked on in shock as transatlantic phone calls were hurriedly made to decide if the show would be canceled. Our departure was pushed ahead an hour while we all sat biting our collective show business fingernails. 

The show must go on.  But must it… really?  Tune in for tomorrow’s thrilling conclusion.

Order THE LAUGH MAKERS on line:

http://www.amazon.com/LAUGH-MAKERS-Behind-Scenes-Incredible/product-reviews/1593933231/ref=cm_cr_pr_link_2?ie=UTF8&showViewpoints=0&pageNumber=2
 
Also available in an unabridged audio version read by the author:  

http://www.audible.com/adbl/site/products/ProductDetail.jsp?BV_SessionID=@@@@0545479184.1272211432@@@@&BV_EngineID=cccjadekfdmleefcefecekjdffidfmf.0&productID=BK_BEAR_000001